b.cognosco

Jesus vs Bush

terrywfrazier@gmail.com — Wed, 19 Jul 2006 02:53:36 GMT

For those of you who don't know, I used to work with cartoonist/artist/social commentator Dan Piraro when we were both living in Dallas. Dan is author of the Bizarro comic strip, a big collection of illustrated novels, anthologies and similar works, painter, performance artist (I hear) and purveyor of skewed merchandise. His latest work is a cool review of his life in art, so far. Sort of like Bizarro, Interrupted.

But this is about this t-shirt. I love it. I take some issue with self-righteous simpletons running around performing senseless acts of stupidity under the cloak of "christian behavior". I never met Jesus. He died before I was born. But I doubt he would have put jesus fish on his donkey, or been happy about corrupt, self-serving politicians using "faith" as a buzzword to pacify the gullible. And I'm pretty sure he'd be appalled at the man we call Mr. President, for a number of reasons.

I just ordered a couple of these. They should go over real well here in the Bible Belt. I'll wear them when I ride my motorcycle. Watch out Soccer Moms. Get yours at www.JesusVsBush.com. All proceeds go to Woodstock Farm Animal Sanctuary.

The Colbert Report

terrywfrazier@gmail.com — Fri, 09 Dec 2005 04:48:27 GMT

Pronounced (ko-bear re-por) because it's French, bitch. Seriously, I watched Stephen Colbert on The Daily Show for the last couple of years and I really liked him. But when he announced his own show, The Colbert Report, I thought, "Oh no. This guy is good in small doses. But he could really be tiresome for a full show."

I'm happy to say I was wrong. Colbert is really catching his stride and has developed a killer news anchor parody that is a mix of Stone Phillips (Mr. Gravitas), Shaun Hannity, Rodney Daingerfield, and Geraldo Rivera. The Colbert Report is politically incorrect, irreverent, hard-hitting abuse of the news. And his interviews are often a riot. Highly recommended.

Proof of Global Warming

terrywfrazier@gmail.com — Wed, 07 Dec 2005 16:59:09 GMT

I don't know where this came from. I don't know who created it. I don't know who to credit for it. Someone sent it to me via e-mail.

Brownie to Launch Emergency Planning Consultancy

terrywfrazier@gmail.com — Fri, 25 Nov 2005 02:06:17 GMT

Watching Religion in a Political World on CSPAN, a roundtable discussion hosted by Tom Brokaw and held in conjunction with the inauguration of Notre Dame's new president earlier this year. In the "Capital News" scroll at the bottom of the screen is this announcement:

Former FEMA Director Mike Brown to launch emergency planning consulting firm.

Just one more data point in support of the fact that you don't need to know anything to be a consultant.

Laughter at Sony/BMG's Expense

terrywfrazier@gmail.com — Wed, 23 Nov 2005 22:55:02 GMT

A couple of funny links to laugh at over dinner re: the Sony/BMG mess:

Helpful Phrase Dictionary for Readers of Dissertations and Scholarly Articles

terrywfrazier@gmail.com — Wed, 23 Nov 2005 04:19:01 GMT

A dictionary for those uninitiated in reading scholarly dissertations and articles, provided by anesthesiologist Clark Venable (who's obviously read a few too many.)

Translations of phrases often seen in dissertations and scholarly articles

"It has long been known" ... I didn't look up the original reference.

"A definite trend is evident" ... These data are practically meaningless.

"While it has not been possible to provide definite answers to the questions" ... An unsuccessful experiment but I still hope to get it published.

"Three of the samples were chosen for detailed study" ... The other results didn't make any sense.

"Typical results are shown" ... This is the prettiest graph.

"These results will be in a subsequent report" ... I might get around to this sometime, if pushed/funded.

"In my experience" ... Once.

"In case after case" ... Twice.

"In a series of cases" ... Thrice.

"It is believed that" ... I think.

"It is generally believed that" ... A couple of others think so, too.

"Correct within an order of magnitude" ... Wrong.

"According to statistical analysis" ... Rumor has it.

"A statistically-oriented projection of the significance of these findings" ... A wild guess.

"A careful analysis of obtainable data" ... Three pages of notes were obliterated when I knocked over a glass iced tea.

"It is clear that much additional work will be required before a complete understanding of this phenomenon occurs" ... I don't understand it.

"After additional study by my colleagues" ... They don't understand it either.

"Thanks are due to Joe Blotz for assistance with the experiment and to Cindy Adams for valuable discussions" ... Mr. Blotz did the work and Ms. Adams explained to me what it meant.

"A highly significant area for exploratory study" ... A totally useless topic selected by my committee.

"It is hoped that this study will stimulate further investigation in this field" ... I quit.

Fabulous Food Retrospective for the Holidays

terrywfrazier@gmail.com — Tue, 22 Nov 2005 23:57:13 GMT

Just in time for the annual feast comes this graphic food retrospective featuring fabulous photography from the past. A Jello ring for your tuna isn't going to please your guests? How about some Ham and Banana Hollandaise instead? Or maybe you should try some "variety meats".

Proper cooking can easily affect the color and texture of a food item, so it isn't fair to think a printed copy should exactly mimic the real thing. My own mother could easily boil or fry the color out of even the most orange of carrots. And until I was an adult, I thought all asparagus was white, not just the expensive kind. Some of my mom's food-color manipulations were the result of additive coloring. With enough Imperial margarine, she could turn white mashed potatoes the color of something you send to a lab to have analyzed. And of course Campbell's Tomato Soup would add a Three-Mile-Island fluorescence to anything it touched.

Courtesy of creativepro and Gene Gable.

Hilarious Leather Pants Ad on eBay

terrywfrazier@gmail.com — Fri, 28 Oct 2005 18:47:34 GMT

Yes, yes it is a hilarious ad. I have owned several pairs of leather pants, but they were not dress pants. In the old days before synthetic materials like cordura took over the market leathers (as they were understandably called) were required equipment for motorcycle racing. Leather is still the preferred material for roadrace safety gear. I wish I still had some of my old leathers. My only regret is I got rid of them. [via Ernie the Attorney]

We all have regrets

The description of this eBay item is hilarious. You have to love a description that begins with: "You are bidding on a mistake..." I'm glad to say that I never owned a pair of leather pants, but then there other mistakes I'd like to auction off on eBay.